A Day of Apartment Search Angst

Feeling absolutely done. Just over it. I mean, searching for an apartment should be exciting, right? I used to enjoy it, scrolling through listings for months, dreaming of a new place. But now? Now I'm just done. The moment it gets serious, it's like diving into a sea of frustration. Frauds left and right. And when I do manage to set up a viewing, the response is often a frustrating, "Sorry, we've decided to go with someone else," usually a couple or a guy. So, I decided to change my approach. I tell them I'm moving in with my partner. It’s kind of true? He will visit for extended periods. If it gets me an apartment, I'm in.

Sure, I thought about traveling there first and staying in an Airbnb. But have you seen the options? Windowless bunkbed rooms at the low, low price of 35 Euros a night. No kitchen – seriously, how does that even qualify as an apartment? Plus, a shared bathroom. Oh, joy! Or there's the hostel route, my last resort, where I'd be sharing a room with 15 other beautifully snoring, utterly lost souls. Sadly, couchsurfing isn't what it used to be, and now they expect you to pay for it. I mean, I know there are alternatives, but do I really want to crash on someone's couch for a week or more? I'd say it's their call if someone asked me. If they accept your request, great. If not, well, I guess you keep scrolling.

Now, after last night's dream of packing way too many things and feeling utterly lost about where "home" even is, I woke up with this simmering anger. Couldn't focus on a darn thing. Unfinished tasks just stayed that way – unfinished. Nothing seemed to help, not even my trusted coffee or a slice of chocolate cake, and not even the comforting nuzzle of my soon-to-be-missed cat. So, I asked myself, "What can I do today to get things done and shake off this anger?" My first thought was sports, but that'd only be a short-term fix. Then, I gave my sibling a call to rant about this whole situation, and they hit me with a question: "What do you really need?" I wanted to stomp my foot into the ground in frustration, but to make what clear? What is it that I truly need? Honestly, I don't even know anymore.