Lessons in Timing and Trust
I woke up today feeling tired and just not quite myself. I tried to take three naps, but none of them worked. On one of those tough days, I summoned the last bit of energy I had to tidy up the living room and set up a romantic breakfast. Yep, you know, with a fancy tablecloth, muffins I made myself, veggies neatly arranged on a plate, and fruits cut in a fancy way, plus some grapes for that extra touch. But the rest of the day was a never-ending loop between the couch, my bed, and that 3000-piece puzzle I'm still trying to solve. Help is still welcomed. It was one of those days when cold pizza on the couch and diving into the Harry Potter movies felt like the perfect escape. Today was just one of those off days when things didn't quite go as planned.
For the past few weeks, I've been trying to keep track of my days, specifically how tired I feel as the hours pass. I thought it’s a good idea. Well, it's a good preparation for my upcoming appointment with the “Sleep Doctor”. Thanks to dear narcolepsy, those quarterly check-ups are a constant in my life. At the end of each day, I'd rate how things went and jot down what I did, hoping to find some patterns like Matt D'Avella did.
But after three weeks, I found myself drowning in data. I mean, I like rating my day, but the problem is, by the end of the day, I'm usually far away from my laptop, and the next day, well, it's a new day, and I don't want to dwell on yesterday.
And then, out of the blue, I stumbled upon this thing called "reverse calendaring." Funny thing is, I never even watched the YouTube video about it; I just added it to my never-ending "Watch Later" list, along with a today literally a thousand other videos. But without really knowing what it was, I decided to give it a shot. It felt a bit like those old punch cards people used to clock in and out of work, like when I had my first decent-paying job at a factory. I can still hear the click-click of the machine and smell the sweaty workers and their lukewarm coffee. We were all just waiting for that moment when the clock hit 15. Finally, we'd get to stamp our cards.
Now, I've taken this idea and brought it into the digital age. From 9 to 6 on my working days, I "stamp" each task I do. Well, not every day, especially not on days like today when things are just off. But you know what? It's shown me that I actually get more done than I thought. Although, I'll admit, I still spend too much time on my phone. Maybe I should set a time limit on YouTube again.
This whole reverse calendaring thing, or whatever I think it is, has made me more aware of my body's signals. It's given me the freedom to take breaks without feeling guilty, to dive into a task and step away from it when I need to. On some days, I toss the whole calendaring idea out the window. It might not be less data than my first attempt at finding patterns, but it feels more satisfying. I sense that I'm getting things done, and with my color-coded system (work, chores, goals, sports, and breaks/eating/friends), I'm starting to see some patterns emerge. Maybe I should just give each day a ranking in the calendar, like an overall vibe score, instead of maintaining a separate Google sheet. Or would that introduce too much chaos? Only time will tell. But I can already tell you, that YouTube video was about something entirely different.